I miss her

I drove home today, smiling.
Not because of anyone, but just because I felt touched by someone. I've been numb for way too long. Taking blows without flinching and I realize how unhealthy that is.

These are the nights I miss grandma most. I want her to be in that room waiting for me to talk to her about my day, and asking about hers. I want to talk about the birds. I already feel her slipping away. My memory fades, yet my sorrow grows stronger. I want her advice. I want her hand.